Hi there again, I'm back in this space. Last night I watched a programme on tv, 3rd Degree and it was about the drug Nyaope and how its destroying the lives of young South Africans. For those who don't know what Nyaope is well it is a mixture of dagga and cheap heroin.
The mix has different names, including kataza, pinch and ungu. The drug originated in 2006 in the Pretoria townships of Soshanguve, Atteridgeville and Mamelodi.Nyaope is sometimes mixed with rat poison to enhance its effects. This easily affordable drug is spreading throughout South Africa.The high from the drug lasts for between two to four hours.Small doses of Nyaope causes euphoria and a sense of warmth and wellbeing while larger doses cause drowsiness, feelings of being content, safe and relaxed.Nyaope addicts tend to lead chaotic and criminal lives, revolving around getting their next fix. They explore various ways of obtaining money to buy the drug. The option for most is theft but women often turn to prostitution(very sad). As the drug takes hold and they stop thinking rationally, values and beliefs are forgotten. Nyaope is so addictive that those in its grips have resorted to selling parts from their cars to pay for their next fix(or stealing them from other people's cars,like one of the young men in the programme I watched..he stole from taxi drivers and they gave him one hell of a beating but that did not stop him).Personal hygiene becomes lax and addicts often do not eat proper meals.The drug soon takes its toll on the body, with physical symptoms including severe withdrawals when Nyaope cannot be sourced, bacterial infections of the blood vessels and heart valves, damage to the liver and the kidneys, lung complications and overdose which can lead to death.
Due to the severe withdrawal symptoms experienced, it is difficult to stop using Nyaope without professional help, which offers the medication necessary to control the worst of these symptoms. According to the South African National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence, about 10 teenagers a month seek rehabilitation. This shows that more and more people are becoming aware of the effects of Nyaope and are willing to go into a treatment programme. The unfortunate part is that the treatment of heroin addiction is not cheap because of the high cost of the medication needed to control withdrawal symptoms. Although some rehabilitation centres in Gauteng offer subsidised beds for those in need of urgent treatment and without the means to pay for it, need often outstrips availability. It is vital that as a community we create an awareness of the dangers of drugs and support initiatives taken by the government and non-governmental organisations to curb drug use , only through the combined efforts of society can spiralling drug abuse rates be curtailed. Report suspected drug dealers, support awareness efforts, talk to your teenagers,your friends and even siblings about the dangers of drugs and suggest treatment options to those who may have become addicted.
This means so much to me because I lost a very special person in my life because of substance abuse, I am starting a drug awareness campaign in my community to help those who may have become addicted and to warn those who are even thinking about experimenting about the dangers of drugs.
For more info or if you want to get involved please send me an email on Vjaphta@gmail.com
#Thought of the week# Drugs kill, love yourself enough to not destroy yourself with drugs!!
Wednesday, 17 August 2011
Thursday, 14 July 2011
LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS : what not to do
Hello again guys,I hope that all has been well with all of you. Relationships are hard period but to be in a long distance relationship is even harder,you don't see the person as often as you would like to and the fact that you are miles apart makes it hard for you to trust your partner. Many relationships fail due to this,yes love is a very important tool in a relationship but people also need to understand that trust is just as important and without it your relationship is doomed.
Most long distance relationships don't stand the test of time because the people in them make mistakes,I call them 'the no no nos of long distance relationships'..
Every relationship – whether separated by distance or not – requires that two individuals give each other enough space to grow. However, when you have been away from each other for a long time, you might want to be clued into everything that your partner is doing – what he did over the weekend, who were the friends she went out with for shopping or what is for dinner tonight. While it is a good idea to be in touch on daily basis, prying too much into your partner’s routine or social life may put him or her off the relationship.
Appearing insecure
If you are insecure about the people your partner is meeting while living away from you, then it is a sign, that you are not emotionally mature enough for a long distance relationship. If you keep nagging your partner about how miserable it is for the two of you and how the other couples have it so well, it is bound to upset him or her that you feel so miserable about the relationship. Instead, look at the positive side to a long-distance relationship and take heart, that a meeting after a period of absence will be that much sweeter.

Making allegations of infidelity
Once the seeds of suspicion have been planted in your relationship, it is the beginning of the end. If you are suspicious of your partner’s co-workers, friends, flat mates and other social acquaintances, it means that you do not trust your partner wholeheartedly. Worse still, if you charge your partner with being unfaithful to you, without any concrete evidence, it means that the faith in your relationship has gone and every relationship –long distance or not – is bound to collapse without the foundation stone of trust.
Taking your partner for granted
While it is a mistake to nag your partner about his or her life away from you, it is equally fatal to take your lover for granted. It is a fact, that every relationship needs to be nurtured in order to blossom, but in a long distance relationship, it is especially crucial that you put in that extra bit of effort, to keep it going. Be creative in coming up with romantic ideas to spice up your relationship, even if it is separated by distance.
Not involving your partner in the relationship
When the two of you are living separately, it is easy to fall into the habit of taking decisions on your own. But take care to involve you partner, in matters where you both are concerned. For instance, ask your lover what he or she thinks of a Caribbean cruise the next time you can be together. Or inform your partner before you make any changes to a joint bank or credit card account.
Adopting a wait-and-see stance
Very often, couples living away from each other, do not believe that their relationship can work, but at the same time they are reluctant to let go of each other. If you keep sitting on the fence, waiting to see how things might turn out, remember that this is not a relationship at all and will get you nowhere.
Saving all your money for later
If it is within your means, make sure that you can meet up with your partner as often as possible. It makes no sense, saving your money now and planning to spend it later, when you have agreed that this relationship is your future. So why not spend on it?
Not being in touch
Pick up your partner’s phone calls, even if it is to say that you’ll be calling back. Keep in touch with each other by phone, email and text messages. A good way of bridging the distance just a little, is to use a web cam, since this offers a way to visually communicate with each other in real time.
Having an affair yourself
The biggest mistake, in my opinion, is to look for a third person to fill in for your partner, when he or she is not around. By allowing an outsider to enter your life – however briefly – you are breaking the basic bond of mutual trust that holds two people together. This is not only cheating on your partner, but an indication that you do not believe in the relationship yourself.
Not having enough faith in the relationship
There is no dearth of pessimists, who are ready to write off long distance relationships as impractical and thus impossible to maintain. Don’t believe all that critics say, because once you give in to their negative comments, you will always feel haunted by its risks – both imagined and real – until it will actually destroy your relationship. So if and when you do decide to enter into a long distance relationship, give it your all and it will surely enrich your life.
These are some of the mistakes most common in a long distance relationship which needs that much more effort to keep it going because of the pressures exerted by time and distance. However, this is not to say that long distance relationships are doomed from the start. If couples trust each other and make that extra effort to keep the fire burning, then, very few romantic encounters are as ecstatic as those, which come after periods of separation.
#Thought of the week# Trust is very important in a relationship,it is the foundation that keeps it all together!!
Most long distance relationships don't stand the test of time because the people in them make mistakes,I call them 'the no no nos of long distance relationships'..
Every relationship – whether separated by distance or not – requires that two individuals give each other enough space to grow. However, when you have been away from each other for a long time, you might want to be clued into everything that your partner is doing – what he did over the weekend, who were the friends she went out with for shopping or what is for dinner tonight. While it is a good idea to be in touch on daily basis, prying too much into your partner’s routine or social life may put him or her off the relationship.
Appearing insecure
If you are insecure about the people your partner is meeting while living away from you, then it is a sign, that you are not emotionally mature enough for a long distance relationship. If you keep nagging your partner about how miserable it is for the two of you and how the other couples have it so well, it is bound to upset him or her that you feel so miserable about the relationship. Instead, look at the positive side to a long-distance relationship and take heart, that a meeting after a period of absence will be that much sweeter.

Making allegations of infidelity
Once the seeds of suspicion have been planted in your relationship, it is the beginning of the end. If you are suspicious of your partner’s co-workers, friends, flat mates and other social acquaintances, it means that you do not trust your partner wholeheartedly. Worse still, if you charge your partner with being unfaithful to you, without any concrete evidence, it means that the faith in your relationship has gone and every relationship –long distance or not – is bound to collapse without the foundation stone of trust.
Taking your partner for granted
While it is a mistake to nag your partner about his or her life away from you, it is equally fatal to take your lover for granted. It is a fact, that every relationship needs to be nurtured in order to blossom, but in a long distance relationship, it is especially crucial that you put in that extra bit of effort, to keep it going. Be creative in coming up with romantic ideas to spice up your relationship, even if it is separated by distance.
Not involving your partner in the relationship
When the two of you are living separately, it is easy to fall into the habit of taking decisions on your own. But take care to involve you partner, in matters where you both are concerned. For instance, ask your lover what he or she thinks of a Caribbean cruise the next time you can be together. Or inform your partner before you make any changes to a joint bank or credit card account.
Adopting a wait-and-see stance
Very often, couples living away from each other, do not believe that their relationship can work, but at the same time they are reluctant to let go of each other. If you keep sitting on the fence, waiting to see how things might turn out, remember that this is not a relationship at all and will get you nowhere.
Saving all your money for later
If it is within your means, make sure that you can meet up with your partner as often as possible. It makes no sense, saving your money now and planning to spend it later, when you have agreed that this relationship is your future. So why not spend on it?
Not being in touch
Pick up your partner’s phone calls, even if it is to say that you’ll be calling back. Keep in touch with each other by phone, email and text messages. A good way of bridging the distance just a little, is to use a web cam, since this offers a way to visually communicate with each other in real time.
Having an affair yourself
The biggest mistake, in my opinion, is to look for a third person to fill in for your partner, when he or she is not around. By allowing an outsider to enter your life – however briefly – you are breaking the basic bond of mutual trust that holds two people together. This is not only cheating on your partner, but an indication that you do not believe in the relationship yourself.
Not having enough faith in the relationship
There is no dearth of pessimists, who are ready to write off long distance relationships as impractical and thus impossible to maintain. Don’t believe all that critics say, because once you give in to their negative comments, you will always feel haunted by its risks – both imagined and real – until it will actually destroy your relationship. So if and when you do decide to enter into a long distance relationship, give it your all and it will surely enrich your life.
These are some of the mistakes most common in a long distance relationship which needs that much more effort to keep it going because of the pressures exerted by time and distance. However, this is not to say that long distance relationships are doomed from the start. If couples trust each other and make that extra effort to keep the fire burning, then, very few romantic encounters are as ecstatic as those, which come after periods of separation.
#Thought of the week# Trust is very important in a relationship,it is the foundation that keeps it all together!!
Monday, 20 June 2011
EMOTIONAL DEPENDENCY - Men actually want this
People often ask me how I manage to have such a healthy loving and fun relationship with my man and I just tell them one thing, 'just make sure your man is emotionally dependent on you and all will be weell'. Whenever you hear the word “dependency,” most of us think in terms of some form of addiction or disease. It tends to imply something that should be avoided, fixed, or terminated. Most individuals with dependencies are those with addictive personalities, and thus rely on others to meet their needs and fulfill their responsibilities. Not the type of person you want to be in a relationship with, or aspire to become.
What if I told you that making a man emotionally dependent on you was a good thing? In fact, what if I could convince you that a man wants to be emotionally dependent on the woman of his choice?
As far fetched as this might sound, I promise you that most men view a relationship with a woman as a prize. A woman has the ability to take away a man’s pain and make him feel powerful at the same time. In no other place can a man find such a combination in one package.
Q. How can a woman utilize her advantage as a woman to induce such a state over a man?
A. It is by practicing the very skills that cause men that they are usually not interested in to pursue them.
When I am speaking with a friend who asks me how they should act regarding a man they are interested in I say something like this….
“Imagine this man weighed 400 kilos and didn’t bathe. I mean really didn’t take a bath/shower more than once every month. How would you act around him?”
Some laugh. Others don’t say anything at first, but once they do respond, it is almost universal, “I wouldn’t care about his opinion, or impressing him, so I’d do whatever I wanted.” That is not to say that they would be rude or unfeeling, it simply means that they would not be worried about saying the wrong thing or behaving in a certain way in order to impress him.
This causes me to respond….
“Exactly - that’s why the men you are not interested in having a relationship with like you so much.”
In those instances, what each woman is practicing is something called the ability to be at ease. This principle applies to both men and women. However, when a woman acts in such a way, it is naturally more attractive than when she is “trying” to engage a man.
Some may call “the ability to be at ease” acting indifferent. However, it is more than merely pretending you don’t care. What men notice is a woman who can be soft when a man is caring and firm when he is indifferent. In short, a woman who believes and behaves as though she is valuable. Such a woman causes men to adore her and never even consider leaving her side.
So when you are unsure about your role as a woman in a relationship, remember that creating emotional dependency isn’t just good for a man, it is what he is hoping you will do for him. Just don’t expect him to admit it.
#Thought of the week: Create emotional dependency,it is what he is hoping for..believe me I know what I'm talking about
What if I told you that making a man emotionally dependent on you was a good thing? In fact, what if I could convince you that a man wants to be emotionally dependent on the woman of his choice?
As far fetched as this might sound, I promise you that most men view a relationship with a woman as a prize. A woman has the ability to take away a man’s pain and make him feel powerful at the same time. In no other place can a man find such a combination in one package.
Q. How can a woman utilize her advantage as a woman to induce such a state over a man?
A. It is by practicing the very skills that cause men that they are usually not interested in to pursue them.
When I am speaking with a friend who asks me how they should act regarding a man they are interested in I say something like this….
“Imagine this man weighed 400 kilos and didn’t bathe. I mean really didn’t take a bath/shower more than once every month. How would you act around him?”
Some laugh. Others don’t say anything at first, but once they do respond, it is almost universal, “I wouldn’t care about his opinion, or impressing him, so I’d do whatever I wanted.” That is not to say that they would be rude or unfeeling, it simply means that they would not be worried about saying the wrong thing or behaving in a certain way in order to impress him.
This causes me to respond….
“Exactly - that’s why the men you are not interested in having a relationship with like you so much.”
In those instances, what each woman is practicing is something called the ability to be at ease. This principle applies to both men and women. However, when a woman acts in such a way, it is naturally more attractive than when she is “trying” to engage a man.
Some may call “the ability to be at ease” acting indifferent. However, it is more than merely pretending you don’t care. What men notice is a woman who can be soft when a man is caring and firm when he is indifferent. In short, a woman who believes and behaves as though she is valuable. Such a woman causes men to adore her and never even consider leaving her side.
So when you are unsure about your role as a woman in a relationship, remember that creating emotional dependency isn’t just good for a man, it is what he is hoping you will do for him. Just don’t expect him to admit it.
#Thought of the week: Create emotional dependency,it is what he is hoping for..believe me I know what I'm talking about
Thursday, 5 May 2011
Learning to love myself
Haven't done this in a while, been away on a soul searching mission but I must say it sure does feel good to be back. I have come to appreciate the power of truly loving myself. Most of my life, being alone was one of my biggest fears. I found myself in numerous relationships for the wrong reasons and ended up settling in ill-fitting ‘partnerships’. This deeply rooted fear and lack of understanding of myself caused the relationships to become my whole world; my focus of attention; my center. I would sacrifice my own goals for the other person. And, when the relationship collapsed, so did my sense of self.
Through much introspection, I realized the source of these failed relationships was myself. I realized that I didn’t truly love or appreciate myself and had relied on external sources for love and approval. I decided to change. I had to overcome my fear of loneliness by finding independence and personal freedom. Even since I found true appreciation for myself, the quality of relationships I have attracted has been phenomenal. I have discovered that the more I loved and understood myself, the less I feared being by myself, and the more healthier relationships I was able to attract into my life.
I started doing what I called “Dates with myself“. Regardless my external relationship status, I would schedule time with myself. I would literally take myself out on a date and spend that time totally focused on myself. It’s my time. We spend so much time and energy focused on others that we forget to recharge the source of that energy. It is only when you are well that you can have the energy and internal resources to make a positive difference and help others. This is a simple, yet powerful concept that can dramatically improve your wellbeing, effectiveness and mental health.
Before attempting a ‘date with yourself’, Here are a few things to keep in mind:
Remove Disturbances – unplug your phone, power down the cell phone and blackberry, shut down the computer, turn off the tv. Do not let your mind get distracted during your self-date. This is your time to just be with yourself.
Being Solo – It’s important that you are on your own. You can talk to strangers, and make new friends, but you are on the self-date to get acquainted with yourself, no one else. If you live with a partner, schedule it so he/she isn’t home, or just take yourself out of the house. If you have kids, find a sitter, or plan around when your kids are not at home. It’s also important to realize that this time is a gift for yourself, and you should only be focused on your well-being.
Schedule - Plan how long you would like your dates to last. Set a minimum time, and commit to focus on yourself for at least that time. I typically schedule 2-4 hour dates with myself.
Communicate - if you are in a relationship, it’s important to communicate what you are doing and it’s benefits clearly with your partner. Not only do we get their support, but also avoid any misunderstandings or neglect.
Here are some ideas for ‘dates with yourself’. You can intermix several activities below into one date:
Reading Date – Go to a trendy café or find a comfortable place at home and read something inspirational for an hour or more. Have some hot herbal tea, cut up some fruits or crackers with cheese. Fully enjoy the experience.
Forgiveness & Gratitude Date – Find a comfortable spot. I like to sit on a bench overlooking the water at sunset, or curled up on the couch in my living room table surrounded by candles.
Forgive – Write on a journal or loose paper all the things you forgive yourself for. We tend to be very harsh on ourselves, and voluntarily blame ourselves internally for failures, failures of achievement, failures to action, etc. Take this time to forgive yourself for all the harsh things said, for mistreatment of your health, etc.
Gratitude – List out all the things in your life you are thankful for. This is my favorite thing to do.
Admiration - List out all the things that others admire about you. What are some things they’d say that you are good at or have natural abilities towards? Notice that I wanted you to pretend to be another person looking at yourself. We tend to blank on this question when asking ourselves directly.
Musical Date – Take in a live concert after treating yourself to a healthy and satisfying meal. Another idea is going to a jazz club or a show. Talk to strangers when you are there. You’ll find the experience much more rewarding.
Yoga or Meditation Date – Take a group yoga or meditation class at a local gym, community center, or temple.
Outdoors Date – Go for a long walk in an area that interests you. Go to a park, go camping, go for a long drive.
This is going to be a very long and beautiful journey, I hope it is as fulfilling to you as it was to me. Loving yourself is the best gift you can give to yourself!!
#Thought of the week: love yourself because no one can do it better than YOU!!!
Through much introspection, I realized the source of these failed relationships was myself. I realized that I didn’t truly love or appreciate myself and had relied on external sources for love and approval. I decided to change. I had to overcome my fear of loneliness by finding independence and personal freedom. Even since I found true appreciation for myself, the quality of relationships I have attracted has been phenomenal. I have discovered that the more I loved and understood myself, the less I feared being by myself, and the more healthier relationships I was able to attract into my life.
I started doing what I called “Dates with myself“. Regardless my external relationship status, I would schedule time with myself. I would literally take myself out on a date and spend that time totally focused on myself. It’s my time. We spend so much time and energy focused on others that we forget to recharge the source of that energy. It is only when you are well that you can have the energy and internal resources to make a positive difference and help others. This is a simple, yet powerful concept that can dramatically improve your wellbeing, effectiveness and mental health.
Before attempting a ‘date with yourself’, Here are a few things to keep in mind:
Remove Disturbances – unplug your phone, power down the cell phone and blackberry, shut down the computer, turn off the tv. Do not let your mind get distracted during your self-date. This is your time to just be with yourself.
Being Solo – It’s important that you are on your own. You can talk to strangers, and make new friends, but you are on the self-date to get acquainted with yourself, no one else. If you live with a partner, schedule it so he/she isn’t home, or just take yourself out of the house. If you have kids, find a sitter, or plan around when your kids are not at home. It’s also important to realize that this time is a gift for yourself, and you should only be focused on your well-being.
Schedule - Plan how long you would like your dates to last. Set a minimum time, and commit to focus on yourself for at least that time. I typically schedule 2-4 hour dates with myself.
Communicate - if you are in a relationship, it’s important to communicate what you are doing and it’s benefits clearly with your partner. Not only do we get their support, but also avoid any misunderstandings or neglect.
Here are some ideas for ‘dates with yourself’. You can intermix several activities below into one date:
Reading Date – Go to a trendy café or find a comfortable place at home and read something inspirational for an hour or more. Have some hot herbal tea, cut up some fruits or crackers with cheese. Fully enjoy the experience.
Forgiveness & Gratitude Date – Find a comfortable spot. I like to sit on a bench overlooking the water at sunset, or curled up on the couch in my living room table surrounded by candles.
Forgive – Write on a journal or loose paper all the things you forgive yourself for. We tend to be very harsh on ourselves, and voluntarily blame ourselves internally for failures, failures of achievement, failures to action, etc. Take this time to forgive yourself for all the harsh things said, for mistreatment of your health, etc.
Gratitude – List out all the things in your life you are thankful for. This is my favorite thing to do.
Admiration - List out all the things that others admire about you. What are some things they’d say that you are good at or have natural abilities towards? Notice that I wanted you to pretend to be another person looking at yourself. We tend to blank on this question when asking ourselves directly.
Musical Date – Take in a live concert after treating yourself to a healthy and satisfying meal. Another idea is going to a jazz club or a show. Talk to strangers when you are there. You’ll find the experience much more rewarding.
Yoga or Meditation Date – Take a group yoga or meditation class at a local gym, community center, or temple.
Outdoors Date – Go for a long walk in an area that interests you. Go to a park, go camping, go for a long drive.
This is going to be a very long and beautiful journey, I hope it is as fulfilling to you as it was to me. Loving yourself is the best gift you can give to yourself!!
#Thought of the week: love yourself because no one can do it better than YOU!!!
Wednesday, 19 January 2011
Speak Your Mind: I am not my weight
Speak Your Mind: I am not my weight: "'Fat is ugly'..that's what the media is saying,women worldwide are being manipulated day in and day out. According to them,being thin is bei..."
Monday, 17 January 2011
I am not my weight
"Fat is ugly"..that's what the media is saying,women worldwide are being manipulated day in and day out. According to them,being thin is being defined as beautiful and perfect..if you are not a size 30 you are made to feel like you are committing a crime or something,now tell me is there a law out there or a rule that states that being voluptuous is a crime?!? This really makes me angry because young girls out there are suffering,starving themselves just to fit the image that the media is selling of a perfect woman.
A while ago this young girl who was beautiful,loving,talented,funny and full of life was a victim of this,this girl grew up in a good home with loving parents and siblings. This girl was slowly dying inside,she was a size34 and everyone called her names. Ugly,big mamma,oros..she was bullied and all because her classmates said that she was ugly because she was fat. Well I guess I don't blame those kids for doing that to her,it is the media that has poisoned their minds.this young girl starved herself,started bunking school and got involved with bad company. She was a very bright girl,who loved life and had a lot of light that was brighter than the sun but that all changed as soon as she got involved with those people. Her marks went down,she didn't care much about anything let alone herself,this girl was so beautiful and yet she couldn't see that,all she could see was the fat the very same fat that the media said was ugly. Finally high school was over,she matriculated and here she thought that all her problems where gone well little did she know that they were just starting. Tertiary was hell,she gained more weight and she was now a sze 36. She couldn't take it anymore,it all just became too much for her so she committed suicide.
I've always been chubby and I'll admit I see a bit of myself in that story,I've always hated my body because people never really took the time to know me as a person but instead I was seen as the chubby girl. Peolple never really knew my name,'sdudla' was a name I got used to. I was afraid to speak my mind,I loved dancing,singing and so much more but nobody took the time to ask because people think that when you are 'thick' you are lazy. I soon realised that people will never stop thinking that about me until I did something about it. I joined the choir,sang a solo at a competition,entered a talent show,started talking..I finally realised that I am not my weight yes I was chubby but that did not define who I was.people started to respect me,finally treated me like a human being,they also realised that I am not my weight.
Everyone is different and beautiful in their own special way,people need to stop taking what the media is feeding them..this starts with you as an individual. Women out there have to love and respect themselves because when you feel beautiful and sexy,you will look beautiful and sexy..look yourself in the mirror and say,I AM NOT MY WEIGHT!!
#thought of the week: love yourself
A while ago this young girl who was beautiful,loving,talented,funny and full of life was a victim of this,this girl grew up in a good home with loving parents and siblings. This girl was slowly dying inside,she was a size34 and everyone called her names. Ugly,big mamma,oros..she was bullied and all because her classmates said that she was ugly because she was fat. Well I guess I don't blame those kids for doing that to her,it is the media that has poisoned their minds.this young girl starved herself,started bunking school and got involved with bad company. She was a very bright girl,who loved life and had a lot of light that was brighter than the sun but that all changed as soon as she got involved with those people. Her marks went down,she didn't care much about anything let alone herself,this girl was so beautiful and yet she couldn't see that,all she could see was the fat the very same fat that the media said was ugly. Finally high school was over,she matriculated and here she thought that all her problems where gone well little did she know that they were just starting. Tertiary was hell,she gained more weight and she was now a sze 36. She couldn't take it anymore,it all just became too much for her so she committed suicide.
I've always been chubby and I'll admit I see a bit of myself in that story,I've always hated my body because people never really took the time to know me as a person but instead I was seen as the chubby girl. Peolple never really knew my name,'sdudla' was a name I got used to. I was afraid to speak my mind,I loved dancing,singing and so much more but nobody took the time to ask because people think that when you are 'thick' you are lazy. I soon realised that people will never stop thinking that about me until I did something about it. I joined the choir,sang a solo at a competition,entered a talent show,started talking..I finally realised that I am not my weight yes I was chubby but that did not define who I was.people started to respect me,finally treated me like a human being,they also realised that I am not my weight.
Everyone is different and beautiful in their own special way,people need to stop taking what the media is feeding them..this starts with you as an individual. Women out there have to love and respect themselves because when you feel beautiful and sexy,you will look beautiful and sexy..look yourself in the mirror and say,I AM NOT MY WEIGHT!!
#thought of the week: love yourself
Wednesday, 12 January 2011
Pay attention
You know I really have a hard time paying attention to a person to hardly pays attention to their surroundings and themselves. I mean would it hurt to just pick up a newspaper,watch the news or even listen to the radio. 'I do not have enough time,I'm always so busy' is what most of them say,how shallow!! I urge everyone out there to take the time to pay attention,even if it is just for five minutes..you never know you might be saving someone's life better yet even your own!!
#Thought of the week: pay attention
#Thought of the week: pay attention
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